Living with other people is like being on a team — except the practice never ends, there’s no coach, and everyone has a different idea of what “clean” means.
When I think back on university, I always reflect on my second year. It was my best year in terms of roommates. We were close, comfortable, aligned. But here’s the twist: it wasn’t my best year overall.
My third and fourth years were better socially, academically, personally. And in those years? I wasn’t close to my roommates. We weren’t friends. We didn’t hang out. Even now, we’re not connected in any meaningful way.
But I genuinely liked living with them.
That’s something we don’t talk about enough. Living with people you don’t know — or don’t become best friends with — doesn’t have to be dramatic. It can simply be functional. Respectful. Normal.
And that’s often what student housing communities are built around. At places like Palay, the focus isn’t just on finding your lifelong best friend — it’s on creating an environment where coexistence feels natural. Shared lounges, study spaces, and community events exist to make connection possible, but not forced. You can build friendships in common rooms or simply appreciate the quiet comfort of knowing other students are living alongside you.
Sometimes the win isn’t a picture-perfect roommate story. It’s having a space that supports your life — socially when you want it, independently when you need it.
Here’s how to make it work.
1. Set Boundaries Early
The most important conversations happen at the beginning.
According to guidance on roommate boundary-setting from Therapy Trainings, healthy shared living starts with clarity — not assumptions. That means discussing expectations around privacy, guests, quiet hours, and shared responsibilities before tension builds.
Start with personal items. Is your home a “what’s mine is yours” situation? Or is it strictly separate?
There’s no right answer — only a clear one.
Unspoken expectations are where resentment grows. You may think it’s obvious that your olive oil isn’t communal. Your roommate may think the opposite. Five dollars’ worth of condiments should not be the hill your lease dies on.
Boundaries are not about being rigid. They’re about protecting the comfort of everyone in the space.
2. Divide Cleaning Like Adults
Cleaning is rarely about cleanliness. It’s about fairness.
Apartment Therapy suggests that splitting chores evenly — rather than informally — prevents conflict. The key? Don’t divide tasks like dishes down the middle. That’s a daily friction point. Instead, rotate larger responsibilities weekly.
One person takes garbage and recycling. Another vacuums and wipes surfaces. Switch the following week.
A simple chore rotation avoids the silent scorekeeping that quietly ruins roommate dynamics.
And yes — a chore wheel may feel elementary. But nothing feels worse than being the only one scrubbing the stove before your midterm.
3. Be Strategic About Groceries
Sharing food is rarely ideal. But selectively sharing can make sense.
Milk. Bread. Condiments. Cleaning supplies.
In my early years of living away from home, I wasted so much food because I didn’t know how to shop for one person. Splitting certain staples reduced waste and saved money. It also made the apartment feel fuller — like the fridge wasn’t just survival-mode stocked.
The key is clarity. Decide together what’s communal and what’s not. Label if needed. It’s practical, not passive aggressive.
4. Remember: It’s Still Your Space
So many people become timid when living with strangers. As if they’re temporary guests in a space they equally pay for.
You are not.
You deserve to feel at home.
Yes, respect matters. Noise awareness matters. Communication matters when bringing people over. But you don’t need to shrink your lifestyle to accommodate someone else’s.
Different schedules. Different social habits. Different routines.
Coexistence does not require personality erasure.
As highlighted in University Apartments’ discussion on roommates transitioning from strangers to friends, shared living doesn’t always lead to deep friendship — and that’s okay. Sometimes it leads to mutual understanding, quiet support, or simply a stable environment where you can focus on school, growth, and your own circle.
That’s enough.
5. Stop Overthinking the Worst
We tend to overthink the negative because that’s what people share.
Roommate horror stories spread faster than stories about calm, ordinary living. But the truth is, most roommate situations are not extreme. They’re just… fine.
Living with a stranger can be awful. That fear is valid.
But it can also be neutral. Respectful. Quiet. Supportive in small, invisible ways.
You can live beside someone without becoming best friends. You can find yourself without dramatic conflict. You can focus on school, relationships, and growth without your living situation defining your year.
If you can overthink the worst, you can overthink the best.
And you can absolutely overthink the normal.
Sometimes living with a stranger isn’t a transformative experience. It’s just a chapter where you learned how to share space without losing yourself.
And honestly? That’s a skill that lasts longer than any lease.
See you next week,
Olivia Lee
There’s this idea that living alone in university is the end goal. That once you get your own space, your own routine, your own quiet — you’ve made it.
But if you’ve ever lived in student accommodations, especially in a shared apartment space like Palay or University Apartments, you know that’s not really the full picture.
Because the truth is: having roommates in university isn’t just cheaper or more convenient — it fundamentally changes how connected, grounded, and supported you feel during one of the biggest transitions of your life.
And yes — choosing to live alone might feel like freedom, but it also comes with something no one warns you about: missing out.
Comfort
Change is inevitable. And uncomfortable. And honestly? Kind of brutal.
Starting university — especially if it means moving cities, provinces, or countries — is one of the biggest shifts most 18-year-olds will ever experience. One day you’re coming home to the same people you’ve known your entire life. The next day, you’re starting from zero.
University does a decent job preparing you for the “real world.” It does a terrible job preparing you for being alone in it.
This is where roommates — and student housing communities — matter more than we realize. Living with others creates a buffer during that high-shock transition period between high school and university. You’re not coming home to familiar faces, but you are coming home to people who are just as new, unsure, and overwhelmed as you are.
Think of it as a built-in “have you met Ted?” moment — but for adulthood.
There’s a reason so many student housing communities are designed around shared spaces. According to reflections from students living in purpose-built housing, roommates often become the first real sense of stability when everything else feels unfamiliar. You’re adjusting together. Failing together. Figuring it out in real time — together.
That shared discomfort? That’s comfort.
Social Life & Connection
We already know change is hard. What we talk about less is how isolating it can be.
A majority of university students report feeling lonely at some point during their studies. New coursework, new expectations, new routines — and somehow you’re also supposed to magically build a social life from scratch.
This is where roommates do more than just exist in the same space as you.
When you live in student housing — especially in communities intentionally built for connection — you’re almost never actually alone. There’s someone to complain to about your three-hour lab. Someone who understands why you’re stressed during midterms. Someone to sit with in silence when the day was just… a lot.
And yes, sometimes that looks like going out — splitting Ubers, getting ready together, pre-drinks in the kitchen. But sometimes it’s smaller than that. Your roommate popping into the living room and asking if anyone wants to go get a sweet treat.
Those moments don’t feel monumental when they’re happening. They feel normal.
But that’s the magic of shared living in student housing communities like Palay: connection becomes part of your routine, not something you have to chase.
And when you have that, loneliness doesn’t stand a chance.
Routine & Accountability
Skipping class is inevitable. We’ve all done it.
For the first time, no one is calling you out of bed. No one is checking attendance. No one cares if you show up — and that freedom is intoxicating… until it’s not.
Living alone makes it very easy to disappear into your own bubble. There’s no external nudge. No subtle guilt. No “are you coming?” energy.
But roommates change that dynamic. When you live with people — especially those in similar programs or routines — accountability becomes passive. You don’t need someone lecturing you. You just need someone putting on their coat at the same time you’re thinking about staying in bed.
Research and lived experience both point to this: supportive roommates naturally encourage better habits. You walk to class together. You study together. You procrastinate together — but you also recover together.
In student housing, routines form without effort. Shared schedules, shared study spots, shared motivation. Even when you’re distracting each other, you’re still moving through university with people instead of in isolation.
And that makes a difference.
Final Thoughts
Let’s be honest.
Do roommates mean less privacy? Absolutely. Do they force you to adapt to other lifestyles? Yep. Do they slow down that hyper-independent “I live alone now” fantasy? For sure.
But… what’s the rush?
University has a funny way of making you feel behind — like you should already have everything figured out. Meanwhile, you’re 18, 19, maybe 20 — with so much time ahead of you.
The one thing you don’t have unlimited time for? Those few years in student housing.
Shared kitchens. Late nights. Inside jokes. Group chats. Walking to class together. Coming home to noise instead of silence.
Living alone will come. Independence will come. Quiet will come.
But the version of life where you’re surrounded by people — where connection is built into your day — that’s fleeting.
So have a roommate. Share your space. Create the memories.
Because when you finally get everything you thought you wanted — your own place, your own routine, your own quiet — it’ll feel even better knowing you didn’t skip this part.
And if after all of that… you still think living alone is better?
That’s wild.
See you next week, Liv Lee
Yes, we all know Valentine’s Day is kind of fake. It’s commercial, it’s overdone, and technically… it’s not even a real holiday. And yet – I know you still want the flowers.
University has a way of reshaping how you think about relationships. Not just romantic ones, but the everyday connections that quietly structure your life. The ones formed through routine, proximity, and shared space rather than intention. When people talk about relationships in university, they usually focus on finding your people. What they don’t talk about is how many of your most meaningful relationships aren’t chosen at all. They just… happen.
They start in classrooms. They carry over from past versions of you. And eventually, they follow you home.
In this article, I’m going to talk about the actual relationships we experience in university—the ones every student goes through, but we almost never name.
1. The Academic Relationship
No one really warns you about the relationships that only exist inside a classroom. Not friendships, not strangers—something in between. The kind that make total sense in the moment and quietly disappear once the semester ends.
There’s the person you sit beside every Monday and Wednesday. You chose that seat early on and stuck with it—because most of us do. There’s comfort in familiarity, in knowing where you belong in a room, even if you never talk about it. You make small comments before class, share notes when someone misses a slide, maybe walk out together once or twice. In later undergrad years, this gets easier when you start recognizing the same faces in your program. But in electives, it’s brand new territory. That seatmate becomes your constant for twelve weeks… and then you never see them again. A real connection, built entirely on routine and proximity, with no obligation to last beyond the lecture hall.
Then there are group projects—a different kind of academic relationship, with much higher stakes. Group work forces interaction: meetings, shared deadlines, late-night stress. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it very much doesn’t. If you liked your group, you’ll wave in the hallway, maybe stop for a quick “how are classes going?” If you didn’t, it’s the tight smile or mutual avoidance, like you both silently agreed to erase the experience. And that’s normal. Group work is designed to teach collaboration, but it also reveals compatibility—or the lack of it. We’ve all been the group member someone didn’t love, and we’ve all been relieved to never work with certain people again.
These academic relationships aren’t dramatic or deep, but they’re real. They shape your days, your routines, and your sense of belonging—sometimes without you realizing it—before quietly fading when the semester does.
2. The Transitional Relationship
These are the people from past versions of you—the ones who make a brief reappearance and then quietly fade again. Not quite friends, not quite strangers. Just familiar enough to feel something, not close enough to do anything about it.
It’s the person you talked to for twenty minutes at a bar last weekend, now suddenly sitting three rows ahead of you in class. No follow-up. No acknowledgment. Just mutual amnesia. Eye contact avoided on both sides, as if pretending it never happened is the most respectful option. And honestly, that’s the best part. There’s comfort in the unspoken agreement to let the moment stay exactly where it belongs.
Then there are the people you graduated high school with. How this plays out depends entirely on where you go to university. For me, a lot of familiar faces followed the same path. In first year, it’s all polite recognition—smiles, waves, maybe even a quick hello in passing. By third year, it shifts. The waves stop. The smiles fade. You pass each other in the hallway like two people who share a history neither of you needs to revisit. Sometimes you see them every day. You just don’t acknowledge it anymore.
It feels sad if you overthink it—but it isn’t. University is built on transition. Growth asks for movement, and movement naturally leaves some relationships behind. These aren’t losses so much as evidence that you’re no longer who you were when those connections made sense.
3.The People You Go Home To
Yes, this relationship starts in the most practical ways possible—shared kitchens, yelling “get out of the bathroom,” dividing chores, learning each other’s schedules. But it very quickly becomes more than that.
The relationship you have with the people you go home to shifts constantly. It depends on whether you knew them before moving in, how close you become, how compatible your routines are, and where you are in your own life. There are so many variables, and none of them guarantee anything. Some roommates stay roommates. Others quietly turn into something much bigger.
My favourite roommate relationship was in second year. I say that a lot, and it still feels true every time. There were three of us—four, technically, but we don’t need to get into that—and we were people who never would have chosen each other in any other setting. Different backgrounds, different social circles, different versions of university life. We wouldn’t have looked twice at each other in the hallway. And yet, we became each other’s people. That’s the quiet magic of student housing: it brings together people who would have otherwise passed by, and asks them to figure it out anyway.
When I was working with University Apartments at Wester-Land, one of my favourite things to watch was move-in day. Strangers meeting their roommates for the first time—nervous, polite, unsure. It’s a strange kind of fear, realizing you’re about to live with someone you don’t know at all, for what feels like forever. But it’s also beautiful. Watching unfamiliar faces become comfortable within hours reminded me how quickly shared space can turn into shared life. Just like it did for me.
Final Thoughts
Relationships in university are rarely fixed. They shift, stretch, soften, and sometimes disappear altogether. The person you were inseparable from in first year can feel like a distant memory by third—and that’s not a failure. It’s normal.
When we talk about university, we tend to focus on how it’s supposed to look: lifelong friends, perfectly aligned roommates, seamless connections. We don’t talk enough about how it actually unfolds. In reality, you’ll have a group member you can’t stand. The person you sat beside every day in high school French won’t even glance at you by third-year psychology. The roommates who felt like family in second year might drift into occasional check-ins, or quiet distance.
And somehow, none of that negates what those relationships were when they mattered. They still shaped your days. They still held you during a specific version of your life. What lasts isn’t always the people—it’s the memories, the stories, the moments you’ll return to long after university ends. And that’s enough.
See you next week,
Liv
“How Was Your Day?”
Since graduating, I’ve moved into my own place. Just me.
This feels like the phase where I’m supposed to feel grown. Like my life has direction, purpose, momentum. And I do feel that — at least in the rare moments when the imposter syndrome fades. On paper, this is what moving forward is supposed to look like.
But living alone honestly kind of sucks.
Sure, I don’t have to clean up after roommates anymore, and yes, I can shower with the door open. But beyond those surface-level perks, there’s not much else. If I’m being honest, living alone has made me realize just how much I miss having a roommate — random or not.
What I miss most is the quiet awareness that comes from shared space. Someone knowing your routine without asking. Knowing when your roommate is supposed to be home, and noticing when they aren’t. Not in a controlling way — just in a human one. You don’t realize how grounding it is to have someone wonder where you are until no one does.
In student housing, if you didn’t come home one night, someone noticed. Whether you wanted them to or not. Your presence — or absence — mattered in small, everyday ways.
There’s real power in moments that small. Something as simple as asking “how was your day?” can signal care, recognition, and belonging. ThisBeyond Local article captures that idea beautifully, and helped me put language to what I’ve been missing.
Coexistence Is a Form of Community
That’s when it clicked: what I missed wasn’t constant connection — it was coexistence.
The background laughter. A passing “have a good day” as someone heads out the door. Even in later years, when my roommates weren’t my closest friends, the shared rhythm still mattered. We didn’t need to be inseparable for the space to feel warm.
There’s a level of intimacy in simply existing alongside other people — being seen in the ordinary, without explanation. Student housing is built around that idea, whether you realize it or not. Communities like University Apartments are intentionally designed around shared spaces and everyday overlap, allowing connection to happen naturally, without pressure.
I’ve spent time in two University Apartments communities, and what I appreciated most was how differently coexistence showed up in each. At Wester-Land, shared amenity spaces like the games room made connection feel almost inevitable — watching people meet for the first time felt a lot like watching my own early university experience. At Palay, it’s quieter: quick elevator, small talk, familiar faces, and a sense that sharing a building makes people more open, even in brief moments. That everyday overlap is what makes connection feel natural, not forced.
You don’t have to try to build community when the environment is already doing some of that work for you. Living at University Apartments means having access to programming designed to make connection easier — art initiatives, local parties with live bands, free yoga, and mental health support through partners like MUN Minds. These aren’t just activities; they’re low-pressure ways to be around people without having to force conversation. Sometimes the hardest part of building community is simply finding the entry point. When those opportunities are already there, connection feels a lot more possible.
Community Doesn’t Have to Look One Way
That said, proximity isn’t the only way community forms — and if you’re looking for something more structured, those options exist too.
Student clubs and organizations bring people together around shared interests rather than shared spaces. Clubs are one of the best ways to do this. Regardless of the school you’re attending, McGill and Concordia both offer a wide range of student clubs and associations.
I’ll be honest — I never joined a club.
Post-grad, do I regret that? Of course. Not just because of the networks you build, but because clubs offer a sense of community that doesn’t always revolve around social routines or drinking. That perspective is something I didn’t fully experience.
But I don’t regret my university experience — not even a little.
My community formed in a much less intentional way. I met one of my closest friends by walking the wrong way to Econ 111. We had a terrible professor. I hated Econ. I asked him for notes. Four years later, we’re a group of six — who’ve traveled together and still end up at Cactus Club for happy hour most weekends.
If going out isn’t your thing — or you’re later in undergrad and craving something different — social clubs can be a great alternative. In Montréal, pages like What’s Up Montréal, Visit Montréal, and TheLilacdo a lot of the work for you by curating group activities and events. There are also book clubs, run clubs, and creative spaces like canvas clubs that offer connection without the pressure of nightlife. Being social in new ways often leads you to people you’d never normally meet — and some of those end up becoming the most meaningful connections.
Sometimes community comes from structure. Sometimes it happens by accident. And sometimes it forms quietly, without you realizing it’s happening at all.
Final Thoughts
Leaving student housing made me realize how much I took for granted.
Now, in a new city, starting over, there are moments where the excitement gives way to quiet and the “what have I done?” thought creeps in. And in those moments, it’s not independence I crave — it’s proximity. Someone nearby. Someone around. Someone to ask, “how was your day?”
Spaces that soften the landing matter. Student housing — including communities like Palay and University Apartments — isn’t just about convenience or location. It’s about everyday connection, even when you don’t realize you’re building it.
So if you’re questioning why you’re still there, or wondering when you’re supposed to “move on,” it might be worth rethinking what student housing actually offers. Because sometimes, it gives you more than you realize — until it’s gone.
When was the last time someone noticed if you came home?
When I first thought about budgeting, all I could picture were limitations, restrictions… handcuffs, honestly.
Who has time to think about money when you have class till 10 p.m.?
Learning how to manage your finances can feel overwhelming — especially if no one ever really taught you how to feel comfortable checking your bank account in the first place. Gaining independence sounds exciting, but it also comes with moments of discomfort, confusion, and yes… sometimes embarrassment.
These are a few things I started doing in university that helped me feel more in control of my money — without sucking the fun out of student life.
Get Comfortable Looking at Your Bank Account
We all know it’s easier to tap your card than it is to open your banking app and look at what’s actually inside.
But both matter.
If the thought of scrolling through past transactions makes you anxious, you’re not alone. I’ve been there. Independence comes with a learning curve, and sometimes that includes realizing you spent $50 at cafés in one week without even noticing.
And that realization can sting.
The goal isn’t to judge yourself — it’s to build awareness. Knowing how your money moves is the first step to managing it properly.
If this is your first time budgeting and you don’t know where to start, don’t overcomplicate it. Using a free, pre-built budgeting template — like the ones offered by Microsoft Excel — can make the process way less intimidating. You’re not starting from a blank page, and as a bonus, you’ll get more comfortable using Excel.
If you’re more of a listener than a spreadsheet person, podcasts can be an easy entry point. Young Money with Tracey Bissett is made specifically for students, new grads, and young professionals trying to get a grip on real-world finances. It breaks down budgeting, investing basics, and entrepreneurship in a way that actually makes sense — no guilt, no shame, just practical advice you can apply right away.
If you’re a McGill student, the Financial Literacy Centre is a great resource. Talking about money can feel intimidating, but these centres exist to support students — not judge them. Learning how your money works for you makes everything else feel less scary.
“We Have Food at Home”
Speaking of that $50 coffee habit…
Small purchases like coffee runs, food delivery, subscriptions, and sweet treats add up faster than we realize. And listen — I am fully on board with ending the shame around ordering Uber Eats.
But every second day? That may be a sign you have a slight problem…
This is hard to admit, but Uber Eats was the death of me in university. Not because I didn’t know how to cook — I was just lazy (lol). Waiting in the doorway while the driver called out “Bobby?” with a bag of Taco Bell for five people was humbling, to say the least.
The same goes for subscriptions. Beyond the obvious ones — Netflix, Prime, Disney+, Crave — there’s also ChatGPT, Notion, Canva, Apple Music (or Spotify, depending). You will never fully escape subscription life, but you can decide which ones actually add value to your academic and personal routine.
While writing this, I found an article from Maclean’s really helpful. It breaks down what students are actually spending their money on, and seeing those patterns laid out is oddly grounding. Maybe you relate — maybe you don’t — but at least now you know. And knowing is kind of the whole point.
The top 5 things I spent my money on in University:
Food — groceries + a lot of Uber Eats.
Social life — cactus club happy hour (I miss you).
Clothes — no explanation…
Books & academic materials — an unfortunate must.
Subscriptions & small conveniences — Apple Music student plan, Uber One, and other “it’s only $5” expenses.
Honourable mention: the gym. I didn’t spend extra on the gym because yoga and gym access were included in my student fees — one of the few line items I actually used (and loved). A good reminder that you’re paying for more than you think… whether you use it or not.
A tip that applies to both eating out and subscription overload: student discounts.
I took full advantage of Uber One for students and the Apple Music student plan. Sometimes it feels like a workaround to get the discount — but come on, you’re getting a degree. You can figure it out.
FOMO Is Real (But It Doesn’t Run Your Life)
Okay — maybe this is a bit of a fib. FOMO definitely exists.
But it doesn’t have to dictate your spending.
You don’t have to go out every weekend. And you definitely don’t have to go out every day of the weekend (there are only two — let’s relax).
There is absolutely no shame in staying in. Student housing communities like Palay make that easier by offering shared amenity spaces you already have access to — movie rooms, gyms, outdoor spaces, and study rooms. When I lived at Palay, I took advantage of the amenities (especially the movie room). It also made me realize how many of University Apartments communities across different cities offer the same kind of benefits — and how underrated that actually is.
Are these spaces always as aesthetic as the new café you keep seeing on TikTok that you need to study at? Maybe not.
But they are free.
Well… kind of.
But girl math applies.
Social media has a way of making it seem like everyone else is doing more, spending more, and living louder than you are. But social media isn’t real life.
So go watch a movie in the movie room. I won’t tell if you won’t.
The Bigger Picture
Managing your money in university is really about understanding — and accepting — that you won’t be able to do everything you want to do right away.
And that’s okay.
You’re not behind. You’re not failing. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. University is an investment in your future, and sometimes that means making short-term sacrifices so long-term goals are possible.
That’s what your twenties are for — learning, adjusting, and figuring it out as you go.
Resetting your relationship with money doesn’t mean restriction. It means awareness, balance, and choosing what actually supports your life right now.
